First Love, Last Love
by ar32583
Summary: Lily and James...bittersweet love story but with a happy ending
1. Prolouge

Prolouge

"Please have a seat, Miss Evans. Mr. Schore will be with you in a short while," the young wizard said to the woman with red hair.

"Thank you," Lily Evans said as she looked around the office. Her eyes glanced over the old furniture and stopped at the large puzzle lying on the far end table. Out of curiousity she walked over. It was a picture of the anciet Roman Ruins.

"Wait a minute," murmured Lily to herself. "It's missing a piece"

Lily looked all around the office floor. She had almost given up when she felt her feet step on something, and she instinctively looked down.

"Aha," Lily said triumphantly as she reached down to pick up the piece from the floor and put the last piece to complete the puzzle. "Now, that looks just perfect."

"Hello, is it Miss Evans?" a deep male voice unmistakable with its American accent came from the doorway.

Lily, feeling a little embarrassed, sprang around to face where the voice had come from. Her legs seem to fail her at once. Just as she was going to fall, two strong hands held her up. Lily looked up and stared into the most incredible blue eyes, and she was mesmorized.

"James? Is it really you? James?" Lily said softly as tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Miss Evans, I'm Michael Shore. I was expecting you for a meeting," said the man with the American accent.

That seemed to wake Lily up from her daze. She quickly straightened her robe and her hair and wiped the tears off her face. "Mr. Shore, will you please excuse my behavior just now? I'm sorry. I hope this will not effect our working relationship."

Michael smiled at this witch in front of him. She had such an aura around her, and her eyes, how could he describe her eyes. When those green eyes looked into his eyes moments earlier, he felt as if she could see into his soul. But he simply said, "Not a problem."

They both sat down at the conference table in the middle of the room. Michael started to talk about the contract about the school and the grounds he had looked at. Lily couldn't help but stare at Michael's face. How can two people look so much alike? Her heart was beating so fast that she almost couldn't breathe.

Michael suddenly stopped talking and looked up. "Is there something stuck in between my teeth? Is my face so very amusing, Miss Evans?" He half-heartly joked with her, but he stopped when he saw the look in her eyes. Tears pricked at the corner of Lily's eyes, and despite her best effort to hold them in, they inevitably rolled down her cheeks. He was just about to say something when she picked up her bag and ran out the door without a word.

"Miss Evans." he called out after her, but she was gone.


	2. Beginnings

.ten years ago.  
  
"Lily, you have to get up now, or we are going to be late to Transfigurations again." Martha said hastily as she stormed out of the bathroom. "Professor McGonagall is going to be furious at us AGAIN!"  
  
"Oh, what time is it?" a groggy voice came from under the blanket.  
  
"7:15."  
  
"Oh, you mean I only have 15 minutes to get dressed, get cleaned and get to the other side of the school in 15 minutes," Lily sprang up from her bed. "I might as well be dead."  
  
Thinking of Professor McGonagall's reaction to their tardiness for the third time this week, Martha thought, yeah, we might as well be dead.  
  
In no more than 5 minutes later, the two girls were on their way to class.  
  
"Miss Evans and Miss Milnor, it's certainly nice to see you that you have finally made it to class. Do you realize that it is your third time being late this week, and it is only Wednesday?" Professor McGonagall's stern voice reached the girls as they stepped inside the Transfiguration classroom with their eyes glued to their feet. "And Miss Evans, might I remind you that it is the duty of the Head girl to lead by example. What you expect of others you have to expect from yourself."  
  
"Sorry, Professor. It won't happen again."  
  
"Fine, this time I will take your words, but I will take off 10 points from Gryffindor though," said Professor McGonagall as she walked back to the front of the classroom. "Go to your seats quickly. The Lesson is about to start."  
  
Martha and Lily quickly walked to their seats. Martha made a face at Lily and mouthed the word 'saved' silently. Lily smiled to herself, but quickly stopped as she saw Professor McGonagall was looking to their part of the classroom.  
  
The lesson was over in no time.  
  
"Don't forget to read for the next lecture," Professor McGonagall reminded everyone. "And Miss Evans, would you stay for a few minutes. I would like to have a few words with you."  
  
Lily waited silently as everyone left the room, and walked up to Professor McGonagall's desk. "Professor, I know I'm always late, but I am trying my best to change that habit. It's just that."  
  
"No need to explain about your lateness problem, Miss Evans. It is not what I wanted to talk to you about," Professor McGonagall looked up from the letters she was reading. "When I recommendated you to be head girl, I knew that your other qualities far outweighed your tendency to be late."  
  
"It's not?" Lily was surprised and turned curious. "Then what is it, Professor?"  
  
"I wanted to discuss our head boy, James Potter, with you before the meeting with all the perfects," said Professor McGonagall in the usually stern voice. "James has a bit of a wild side to him, but he's very good boy. And Headmaster Dumbledore is very fond of him, you know."  
  
"I've heard some rumors about him."  
  
"Well, I hope that being a head boy will calm him down a little, and make him look at rules a little differently," said Professor McGonagall. "And I hope that you will be a positive influence on James. Perhaps calm him down a little."  
  
Lily nodded silently. It looked like to her that Professor wanted to say something else, but instead Professor McGonagall said, "It is all. You can go now," and went back to reading her letters.  
  
Just as Lily was leaving the classroom, Professor McGonagall called out, "And Miss Evans, try not to be late to the meeting next week."  
  
Lily smiled despite herself. She really should do something about this bad habit was hers. 


	3. First encounters

"Oh, no, late to the perfects meeting. Professor McGonagall really is going to kill me," murmured Lily as she ran to the classroom of the meeting, suddenly she hit something and the next thing she knew, she was on the cold floor and her books were everywhere.  
  
Lily scrambled to get her books. She has no time to lose, just as she was going away, that something she hit made a noise. She turned her head.  
  
"Are you okay? Oh no, I broke your glasses," Lily said as she kneeled in front of the person, and saw the glasses not a few feet away and picked it up. The head turned towards her.  
  
"Wow, did anyone tell you that you have the most incredible green eyes?"  
  
Lily was startled for a moment. Then she bursts out laughing, "This is not the first time somebody has tried that line on me, but I'm sure it's not the last."  
  
"Hey, I'm hurt," the boy pretended to be serious, but laughed too a few seconds later. "Can't blame a guy for trying."  
  
"I'm Lily Evans, and I would love the stay and chat, but I'm already horribly late for something," said Lily as she made a face. "Professor McGonagall is going to kill me, literally."  
  
"Yeah, I pity the fool who ever crosses her. You better be on your way then," the boy replied.  
  
"Bye," Lily waved her hands as she ran away.  
  
"Sorry, I'm late," Lily said breathlessly as she ran into the classroom filled with Perfects and Professor McGonagall.  
  
"It's quite alright, our head boy have not shown up either," replied Professor McGonagall, with a hint of annoyance.  
  
After 20 minutes of waiting, Professor McGonagall's stern voice quieted all the chatter in the classroom, "it seems that our head boy has decided not to grace us with his presence. Let's just have the meeting without him. Lily, you can start by yourself."  
  
Lily, who has just been talking with another Gryffindor perfect, walked quickly to the front of the classroom. She quickly went over duties they were all expected to handle, and dividing up of tasks. The meeting was over in no time, and everyone was starting to leave.  
  
"Professor, what should I do about our new Winter Ball. The head boy and girl were suppose to handle the details."  
  
"We'll figure it out later," Professor McGonagall looked back from the doorway. "And Miss Evans, you conducted yourself quite well in the meeting. I was pleased."  
  
Martha was outside waiting for Lily. When Lily came out at last, Martha quickly ran to Lily. "Oh, my, was that Professor McGonagall offering a compliment? Or was it just my imagination."  
  
"I was shocked to hear it, too," said Lily with a big smile on her face that lit up her eyes. "You know how she irritated she is with my problem of being late always."  
  
"Did you get a glimpse of the famous troublemaker James Potter?" asked Martha. "I still cannot believe they made him head boy. Headmaster Dumbledore must be fond of him."  
  
"Well, someone didn't feel like this meeting was important to attend," said Lily with anger in her voice. "I believe I have lost respect for him even before meeting him."  
  
"Oh, Lily, lighten up, a lot of girls would kill to be in your position. He's very popular with the girls you know," said Martha as they reached the Great Hall for dinner.  
  
"I wouldn't know, and I don't care," said Lily. "Let's change the subject. I don't want to talk about James Potter anymore."  
  
"Okay, aren't you excited about Hogmeade's trip next weekend?"  
  
"Oh, yes, it's something to look forward to," replied Lily with a happy sigh.  
  
"Oh, no, we are late again, Lily," cried Martha as they walked quickly back to Hogwarts from Hogsmeade.  
  
"We can't let others catch us. What would they say about us, me being head girl and all," Lily said determinedly. "We have to sneak in unnoticed."  
  
"Easier said than done, Lily," cried Martha again. "Oh, I really shouldn't have tried on those last few dresses in the shop. I'm so sorry, Lily."  
  
"Martha, don't worry. Friends always stick together," said Lily. "Let's go by the Whopping Willow. I bet no one will find us there."  
  
It was already dark and the girls had a hard time find their way around.  
  
"I bet there's a secret entry way here somewhere. I mean, Hogwarts is an old school," murmured Lily.  
  
"Lily, can't we just go in the front. I'm freezing to death," complained Martha.  
  
"You wait here. I'm going to go and see the other side."  
  
"Lily, don't leave me here." Martha's voice fainted as Lily ran to the other side. There's got to be a way in. I don't want to disappoint Professor McGonagall again for the thousandth time.  
  
Lily heard footsteps behind her and assumed it was Martha. "Martha, I told you to wait." Lily stopped dead in her tracks when she did not see Martha, instead a great werewolf staring at her.  
  
Lily screamed as loud as she can, and ran directly toward the Whopping Willow. Lily kept on looking back, and she saw the werewolf chasing and howling at her. Lily didn't even realize where she was until she saw a great branch coming down unto her. Oh, I'm really going to be dead now. Lily told herself to run, but her legs seem planted to the ground.  
  
Then suddenly, someone grabbed her hands, and tugged her away. The tree branch missed her by oh, so little. The person suddenly stopped running, and Lily knew why because she saw another giant tree branch coming towards them.  
  
"Run the other way. Hurry," the male voice sounded familiar to Lily, but she didn't have time to think. She was running for her life. Hands grabbed hers again, and then, stairs seemed to come out of nowhere and they were inside a door.  
  
Then Lily screamed again. She came face to face again with none other than the werewolf.  
  
"It's okay. He doesn't bite," said the familiar male voice.  
  
Lily slowly turned around, "it's you!" Lily exclaimed. "I ran into you a few days ago, remember."  
  
The boy smiled and nodded. His face was so white. "Oh, you're bleeding," Lily saw that his arm and leg was cut several places.  
  
"So are you," said the boy. Lily then noticed that she had a few scratches too.  
  
"Oh, my, I am. I didn't even notice, but oh no, I left Martha outside. I have to go and find her," Lily shouted as she ran toward the other end of this tunnel they seem to be in.  
  
"Wait," the boy chased after her.  
  
Lily ran and realized that she was inside Hogwarts now. She quickly ran up the stairs and saw pairs of eyes looking at her including a set of eyes that was especially stern.  
  
"Professor McGonagall," Lily said staring at her feet. "Lily, what happened to you?" Martha said as she ran out from behind Professor McGonagall.  
  
"Martha!!" It was all Lily could say, but she was so happy her friend was safe.  
  
"Miss Evans, are you quite alright. Your friend here informed me she heard screaming near the Whopping Willow ran straight to me. My first question is of course, what were you doing outside at this hour?"  
  
Then footsteps were heard behind Lily and the boy who saved her life came to a halt in front of everyone as well.  
  
"Well, Mr. Potter, good of you to join us. Tell us, what has happened to you," asked Professor McGonagall after she has gotten over her shock.  
  
Potter? Lily suddenly turned to look at the boy standing next to her. This was James Potter?  
  
"Well, I demand an answer at once."  
  
"Professor, I was taking a walk outside, and I saw a." Lily was going to say werewolf, when she felt James' feet hitting hers, and looked at him. He shook his head slightly. "something suspicious. And then I ran into the Whopping Willow, and James..saved.um. showed me another way inside the school." She was going to say he saved my life, but she didn't want to give him the satisfaction.  
  
Professor McGonagall didn't look like she accepted Lily's answer, but she said, "Well, both of you should have known better than to walk around the grounds late a night. Head boy and head girl, what is the example you are setting others. Both of you will be cleaning the grounds outside for three month, and no magic is allowed. Lily, I will have a word with you in my office tomorrow morning. Now, both of you go and get your scratches taken care of."  
  
An hour later. Lily and James were both sleeping in the hospital wing. Lily looked at the boy who was lying on the bed next to hers.  
  
"James, thank you for saving my life tonight," whispered Lily. James didn't move. Lily thought he was probably already asleep. Lily turned and looked the other way.  
  
"Why didn't you tell Professor McGonagall and all those other people about the werewolf?" James suddenly asked.  
  
"I don't know," said Lily quietly. "You seemed to have your reasons for not telling."  
  
Silence.  
  
"He's Remus."  
  
"Who"  
  
"The werewolf is Remus."  
  
"Remus? Remus Lupin? The Remus Lupin who I have potions with?" Lily sat up in her bed.  
  
"Lily, calm down," said James.  
  
"Well, you can start now," said Lily as she lied back down.  
  
"Start what?"  
  
"Your explanation."  
  
So, the rest of the night, James talked, and Lily listened until she fell asleep of total exhaustion.  
  
They were woken up next morning by the nurse who told them they should get to their class now. As they were walking out, Lily called out to James. He stopped and looked back at her.  
  
"I think what you do for Remus is really brave. It must have taken courage to stand by his side," Lily said with a small voice while looking everywhere except at James' face. "I would have giving to my urge to run, to run away from him."  
  
"No, I don't think you would have run," James said as he walked over to give her hand a squeeze.  
  
Lily gave him one of her biggest smile that lit up right to her eyes.  
  
"You do have the most incredible green eyes, you know," said James.  
  
And then both them burst out laughing, neither of them knew why. 


	4. Quiet friendship

"Lily," Martha gave Lily a big hug the minute Lily walked into the seventh year girl's dormitory. "Are you alright? Oh, I was so worried!"  
  
"Yeah, Lily, Martha couldn't not sleep last night at all," said Charlene, another Gryffindor seventh year. "She kept on waking everyone up with her tossing and turning."  
  
"Look, I'm fine," Lily said as she turned out for everyone's inspection. "But I do have lots of tell."  
  
"Yeah, pray tell, Lily, how did you end up with the famous trouble maker James Potter?" asked Emily, another Gryffindor seventh year girl who still haven't quite grown out of her tom-boyishness.  
  
"Yeah, I bet Rebecca St. Jones is so jealousy. Everyone says she has her sights on James Potter," said Charlene as she brushed her hair in front of her mirror. "I bet she wished she was one having a late night walk with James Potter."  
  
"Oh, my, does everyone know about what happened last night?" asked Lily shocked. She recalls only a handful of people witnessing the event.  
  
"Come on, Lily. It is Hogwarts, everyone always knows everything about everybody," said Emily. "There's no point keeping a secret."  
  
"Well, I for one say that is not a good thing," Elaine Cleaver, the bookish girl who always had her nose stuck to a book, finally took notice of the conversation.  
  
"Nothing happened. James Potter just happened to be there when I accidentally walked into the Whopping Willow," said Lily nonchalantly with a shrug of her shoulder. "I don't know what the big deal is."  
  
"The big deal is that one doesn't just walk into the Whopping Willow accidentally," Charlene said with a knowing look at Emily and Martha.  
  
"Hey, I saw that look," said Lily more annoyed than angry. "I'm telling the truth, nothing happened."  
  
"Okay, when you are ready to talk about it, we'll listen," said Martha. "Now, let's get to class, and it may be the first time Lily Evans will actually be on time."  
  
The dormitory was filled with laughter as all five girl walked out to go to class.  
  
Lily Evan's seventh and final year at Hogwarts seem to go by in the blink of an eye. Between her duties of being the head girl, trying to get to class on time, she had to balance her time with the planning of the Winter Ball with James Potter and serving detention with James Potter. That was another thing. James Potter turned out to be a pleasant surprise and a pleasant addition. He doesn't seem like the famous troublemaker everyone made him out to be or the rumored ladies man. He was often very quite, and most of the time, very thoughtful. And sometimes, Lily swears she can see a shadow of sadness in his eyes. Lily didn't really know what was this thing she has with James. They were like friends, only they weren't really friends.  
  
"James," Lily called out as she ran out into the grounds. "Sorry, I'm late again. I was looking for my scarf."  
  
"Lily, you are always late, and like I told you, you don't have to announce it every time and apologize for it," James said with a smile.  
  
"Oh, sod off," Lily playfully hit him on the arm. "This was only the 4th time I'm late in a two month period. I'm really improving you know."  
  
"We've had detention 7 times, and you were late for 4. That makes more than half," exclaimed James with good humor.  
  
"Hey, I don't seem to recall criticizing any of your faults," Lily said, pretending to be annoyed.  
  
"That's because I don't have any," he said with a straight face, but Lily burst out laughing.  
  
"Hey, it's wasn't meant to be funny," said James, but he was beginning to smile himself.  
  
Lily and James start cleaning the ground, with no magic I might add. The wind was strong that day, and it kept on blowing Lily's lovely red hair into her face. Finally, they were done for the day.  
  
Lily started to walk inside the school when James took her hand. Lily turned around, but the stupid wind was still blowing. Just as Lily was going to wipe the hair out of her face, another hand gently pulled the single strand of her hair neatly behind her ears.  
  
Lily couldn't help but blush. She murmured a fast thank you. James didn't release her hand, and she didn't pull away. So, they stood there looking at the beautiful ground around them. Leaves turning yellow, and falling, as if they are too preparing for the winter snow that's to come.  
  
"When do you think the first snow will come?" asked Lily.  
  
"I don't know, maybe in a few weeks," replied James.  
  
"I always look forward to the first snow."  
  
"Why?" "Well, when I was small, my dad always took me and my sister out when it first snowed. And we would each built a snow man," said Lily with a sad expression on her face. "It was before he died. Every year, when it first snows, I always think of him."  
  
"When did he die?"  
  
"When I was 13."  
  
"Mine died when I was 6," said James. Lily couldn't see the expression on his face because he turned the other way, looking into the wind. "I hardly remember his face."  
  
"I'm sure he remembers you."  
  
"Does he? Sometimes I wonder," said James. Before Lily could say anything, James looked at her and asked, "What do you say we go and built our own snowman when it first snows?"  
  
"Um.sure," Lily didn't quite know what to say.  
  
"It's a date then," James said has he smiled. "You do own me for saving your life, you know."  
  
"Such an easy payment, then," replied Lily as they walked back into the school together. 


	5. Falling in love

Lily opened the curtains first thing in the morning, and it was all white outside just as she wished.  
  
"Martha, wake up, It snowed last night," yelled Lily as she danced around the room. "Come on, Em, it snowed."  
  
"It's just snow," murmured a sleepy voice from Martha's bed. "I've never seen you this excited before."  
  
"Lily, it's 6 am in the morning," murmured another voice under the covers. "How come you never wake up this early on a school day."?  
  
"You guys are no fun," said Lily as she started to get ready, to get ready for her first date with James. Well, it's really not a date, technically no, but.Lily stopped herself before she get too carried away.  
  
Lily stepped out into the snow. Oh, it feels glorious. It feels glorious to be alive. She looked around, and there was no one there. It's still early, she thought. Besides, James never said a place or time, but Lily assumed it was here.  
  
"Lily," a voice interrupted Lily's thoughts. "You are up early. You should show this much enthusiasm for school, then you'll never be late to Professor McGonagall's class ever again."  
  
"James, stop making fun of me," said Lily pointing a finger at James. "One more word about my being late always, and I will leave."  
  
"Your wish is my command."  
  
"Come one," Lily grabbed his hand and they ran out into the snow.  
  
Their adventure began. They ran until they were out of breath. Then when James wasn't looking, Lily threw a huge snowball at him. Of course, Lily wasn't James' match in the snowball fight, so it wasn't long before Lily folded her arms in front of her and said in a stern voice that it wasn't fun anymore. To cheer her up, James reluctantly agreed to be her target practice for snowball throwing.  
  
Then they each built an miniature snowman. They sat down on a bench to dress up their little snowman. While James was intensely putting eyes and lips on his snowman, Lily stole a few looks at him. His cheeks were red and his eyes sparkled from all the exercise, and Lily never felt so happy before in her life.  
  
"I'm done," announced James. Lily quickly reverted her eyes to her snowman. They put their snowman side by side.  
  
"So perfect," said Lily, but suddenly James, with a mychivous look on his face, turned the snowman toward each other and moved them closer so they would share a kiss. Lily didn't know what to think.  
  
"Ah, a little jealous of the snowman now," said James in a diflated voice.  
  
Lily didn't know what came over her, but she leaned over and quickly kissed James on the cheek. "Now you don't have to be!" she said quietly while her face turned to the color of flames.  
  
James looked surprised for an second. He never expected Lily to make the first move.  
  
"Lily," James called out.  
  
"What?" replied Lily as she turned her head towards him. Then his lips were on hers. Her eyes opened big, but she slowly closed it as James deepened the kiss. So, this is love, thought Lily. Then the kiss was over, and Lily was left with a heart beating so fast she thought it might explode.  
  
"Come on, no use sitting here when we have all this snow," James grabbed Lily's hands.  
  
They were not quiet a way from school. Lily suddenly noticed James was no longer walking besides her, but behind her. In fact, he was following her steps exactly.  
  
"What are you doing?" asked Lily.  
  
"There are two worlds you know, our world and the shadow world. When you die, you can chose to become someone's shadow so you never has to leave them," replied James looking intensely into Lily's eyes. "I want to be your shadow."  
  
"So would I."  
  
"Look at the time," said James. "We'd better get back before professors wonder where they disappeared to."  
  
Lily said nothing, but simply nodded, not wanting this day to end  
  
They ran back inside the school. They were laughing and dusting snows off of each other's coats when Lily felt a pair of icy eyes on them. She looked up and on top of the stairs was a slender, long blond haired girl looking at them with stone cold expression. If looks could kill, Lily was sure she would died a thousand times already.  
  
Lily tugged on James's sleeve, who was dusting snow from his hair and who still haven't noticed the girl. Before James could look at Lily, another voice rang out.  
  
"Mr. Potter, I have been looking for you the entire day," the unmistakable voice of Professor McGonagall rang out from their left. "Come, come, there's urgent business."  
  
Professor McGonagall briskly took James away, though not looking back one last time at Lily, taking note of her appearance. Lily swallowed uncomfortablely, and started to walk up the stairs.  
  
"Lily Evans, I presume," the blond girl called out as Lily walked past her.  
  
"Yes, but do I know you?" asked Lily.  
  
"No, and there is no need for you to know me, but I am giving you a warning. Stay away from James Potter. I have long had my eyes on him, and what I want, I always get."  
  
"If you always get what you want, then why are you worried about me?" Lily said in the same icy tone the warning was issued in. "Excuse me, I need to change my clothes."  
  
"Lily, where have you been all day long?" asked Martha the minute Lily stepped into the girls' room. "I have been looking all over for you."  
  
"Well, I think the question is who she was with," said Charlene as she walked in with Emily.  
  
"We thought the exchange between you and Rebecca, Lily," said Emily as she popped down on her bed. "Boy, that is the coldest girl you'll ever meet. I would tell you to be careful, Lily. She means business."  
  
"But James doesn't like her. What can she do really?" asked Charlene, looking at Lily.  
  
"What is going on? Why don't I understand what everyone is saying?" asked Martha looking from one girl to the next.  
  
"Martha, I'll tell you later. I need to sort out some of my feelings right now," said Lily quietly as she walked into the bathroom looking forward to a long, hot shower.  
  
"She in love, I know it," said Charlene.  
  
"With who?" asked Martha.  
  
"Who else? The one and only James Potter!" both girl said at once, throwing pillows at Martha. 


	6. New Year's Eve

It was two weeks until Christmas. Professor McGonagall asked both Lily and James to stay during Christmas vacation to see to that all necessary tasks of planning the Winter Ball in January would be completed.  
  
"No, she asked you to stay," a shocked Martha said during dinner one night. "But I thought I was going to stay with you after Christmas when my parents are visiting my brother in South Africa. Who am I going to stay with now?"  
  
"Sorry, duty calls," said Lily who was not at all unhappy to stay, in fact, she was looking forward to spending more time with James. "Professor McGonagall insisted we stay."  
  
"Well, at least you could be more sad about it," said Charlene with a mischievous look in her eyes. "Martha, you come at stay with me."  
  
Lily blushed at Charlene's comment. She thought about her and James' date in the snow. She thought about all the afternoons they spent sweeping the grounds. She thought of all the nights they sat in front of big fireplace in the Gryffindor common room planning the Winter Ball. She thought about how her heart beats faster whenever he's near her. She thought about all the times he's tugged a strand of hair behind her ears.  
  
"Earth to Lily.Earth to Lily." Martha waved her fingers right in front of Lily's eyes.  
  
"What? What is it?" asked Lily, trying her best to hide her embarrassment.  
  
"Did you hear anything we just said?" asked Martha. "You had that faraway look in your eyes again."  
  
"Maybe she was thinking about you know who?" teased Emily.  
  
"No, I was just thinking about the exam we are having tomorrow in Potions," said Lily seriously, trying to convince everyone.  
  
"Sure, then why were you smiling the whole time like an idiot?" asked Charlene innocently.  
  
"You guys are the worst. I'm not going to take part in this conversation anymore," said Lily as she stood up from the table. "I'm going to the library to study now. I'll see you all later."  
  
The other three girls giggled and murmured their good-byes. They know Lily wasn't mad, besides, they know they've got her where James was concerned.  
  
"Lily, what are you doing here?" asked a surprised James when Lily ran into him in the Library.  
  
"I was looking for some place quiet to study," half-lied Lily. "I didn't know you were going to be here." In fact, I knew you were going to be here, but I am looking for a place to study.  
  
"Well, you've found the perfect spot," said James as he moved over one seat. "Sit."  
  
Lily didn't have to be told twice. As she sat down, she saw something hiding under James' jacket. "Is that a record player?"  
  
"Shh, don't say it so loud," James put his hands over Lily's mouth. "You'll get me in trouble, and my friend Sirius."  
  
"Where did you get it?" asked Lily curiously. "I don't think we are allowed such things in school, are we?"  
  
"Well, actually, Sirius and I stole if from an Professor's office," James whispered while making sure no one around them was listening.  
  
"Stole from Professor? How?" Lily wasn't sure what to ask.  
  
"Want to give it a try?" asked James. Before Lily could answer, James had already grabbed his stuff and was walking out.  
  
"Wait for me," Lily hurried to grab all her books.  
  
It was an unusually cold December night, and the wind was hollering away. They sat down on the ground. Lily looked up at the stars while James played with the record player. Suddenly, a haunting romantic melody came out the quiet night. Lily closed her eyes.  
  
"What's it called?" asked Lily.  
  
"First time," replied James looking at Lily. "Do you like it?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Lily, open your eyes, I want to show you something."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Look there, see that really bright star?" pointed James at the sky.  
  
"You mean the North Star?"  
  
"Yeah, I like calling it Polaris. It's my favorite star. My mom told me after my dad died that if I ever get lost, all I had to do was follow Polaris, and my dad will make sure I will find the way."  
  
Lily didn't know what to say so all she did was to look at him. She could see that sadness in his eyes now, the sadness of a little boy who's still grieving over the death of his dad. She put her hand over his.  
  
"Hey, your hands are freezing," said Lily, surprised. "Here, you take one my mittens."  
  
"No, Lily, it's okay," James pushed the mitten away. "  
  
"Your hands feel like ice."  
  
"Lily, it's pink," said James, quite seriously.  
  
"It's warm!" insisted Lily who wouldn't take no for an answer. Finally James accepted.  
  
They both laughed after he put Lily's soft pink mitten one.  
  
"What are you doing for New Year's eve?" asked James.  
  
"Nothing, why?"  
  
"Let's meet here. At midnight, I have something I have to tell you," said James as he packed up all their stuff.  
  
"Why can't you tell me now?" asked Lily who also stood up.  
  
"Come on, it's late. We don't want Professor McGonagall to catch us out here and with a record player, no less," said James ignoring Lily's question.  
  
They walked quietly back to the school, each in their own thoughts.  
  
"Lily," called out James just as they were about to go in the Gryffindor common room. "Your mittens."  
  
"Keep it. You can give it to me on New Year's eve, maybe you'll need it then," asked Lily before she disappeared into the common room.  
  
Lily looked at her watch. 11:45pm. She should probably start get going now if she was going to be on time for the date with James. She put on her warmest sweater and robes, and scarf and that one pink mitten.  
  
It was quiet in the common room since everyone had already left for vacation. Lily quietly slipped out. She hasn't seen James at breakfast, lunch or dinner today. Come to think about it, she hasn't seen him yesterday all day either.  
  
"I hope he remembered our date," said Lily to herself.  
  
So she waited, and waited and waited and waited. She waited until it was light outside. James never showed. With tears at the corner of her eyes, Lily walked back into the castle.  
  
"Miss Evans, what are you doing out so early in this freezing weather?"  
  
Lily looked up. It was Professor McGonagall. She quickly wiped the tears off her eyes, "Professor, I was waiting for someone, and he didn't show."  
  
Professor McGonagall's mouth opened as if she was going to say something, but it quickly closed again.  
  
"Professor, have you seen James lately?" Lily couldn't help herself but ask. Maybe he has some sort of family emergency.  
  
"Miss Evans, you are freezing cold all over," Professor McGonagall quickly said ignoring Lily's question. "Why don't you come in for a hot shower and nice breakfast and come to my office afterwards?"  
  
After the shower and breakfast, Lily ran to Professor McGonagall's office to get some news on James. She forgot to knock before she entered, and she ran straight into Headmaster Dumbledore.  
  
"Oh, Headmaster, I'm so sorry, I didn't see you."  
  
"Miss Evans, it's quite all right, I'm sure you didn't see me," Professor Dumbledore said kindly. "Why don't you take a seat, Lily?"  
  
"Okay," replied Lily, a bit surprised that Dumbledore used her first name.  
  
"I believe Professor McGonagall has something to tell you," said Dumbledore in a grave voice.  
  
"I don't know how to say this, Miss Evans," Professor McGonagall actually looked uncomfortable. Lily braced herself for the bad news. "James, he's dead."  
  
Time suddenly stopped. Lily didn't know how long she sat there staring into empty space, or when Dumbledore left, patting her on the shoulder. Finally, she came out of her daze, she saw a worried Professor McGonagall looking at her.  
  
"How did he die, Professor?" asked Lily in a choked up voice.  
  
"Voldemort."  
  
Tears pricked at the corner of her eyes, and one by one, they dropped down her cheeks, unto her robes, and some even touching the floor.  
  
Lily wiped the tears away. She can't cry. She refused to cry. She refused to think. She refused to exist.  
  
"Does his family know?"  
  
"His mom wants to keep everything quiet. There is going to be no service," said Professor McGonagall, still with a worried expression on her face. "Are you alright, Lily?'  
  
"I'm fine," with those words Lily ran out of the room. She ran out of the castle. She ran and ran, until she collapsed unto the ground.  
  
. Let's meet here. At midnight, I have something I have to tell you .when you die, you can chose to become someone's shadow so you never has to leave them. I want to be your shadow 


	7. Shadows of the Past

**ten years later**  
  
Lily Evans walked out of the flat she shared with Martha in London on a cold and windy night. She stopped for a moment to check her appearance. She was wearing a simple black dress her mother had bought her for the occasion with a long white coat. Over the years, white has become her favorite color. Her long red hair was cut short now, just below her neck, and it framed her face perfectly. Years had taken none of her beauty away, but added maturity and a womanly scent about her. And those gorgeous green eyes were still gorgeous as ever, but at moments, only certain moments, one can catch a cloud of sadness come over them.  
  
Lily looked down on her watch. She still had 20 minutes, and that should be plenty of time to go to restaurant where the party was held. Martha had insisted to go with Lily, partly because everyone was afraid Lily was going to be late. However, Lily wanting to spend a few moments alone before the party, told Martha to go without her.  
  
The wind blew a strand of Lily's hair into her face. And just then, she caught the glimpse of a tall figure who looked so familiar to the one carved onto her memory across the street. Lily quickly wiped the hair out of her face. No, it couldn't be, Lily thought to herself. It just couldn't. It couldn't be James, but he looks so much like James. Without hesitation, Lily turned to cross the street to chase after the man she just saw. There were too many cars on the street. Lily's eyes followed the man as he walked down the street. Finally it was green light, Lily ran as fast as she could, but he seems to have disappeared.  
  
Lily ran down the street, and there was no sign of him. Then Lily decided to check all the shops on that street. Maybe he went inside one of them. Exhausted, Lily came out of the last shop on that street, and then she caught a tall figure wearing the same coat as the man go inside a bar two blocks down. Lily ran to follow him, and grabbed his shoulder, afraid he was going to disappear again.  
  
"Miss, is something wrong?" asked the man who slowed turned around.  
  
"Oh, I'm so sorry, I thought you were someone else," Lily said to a stranger's face. It wasn't James. Of course it wouldn't be James. James was dead. He has been dead for 10 years. Overwhelming tears swelled up in Lily's eyes as she slowly walked down the street. This is not the time to think about James. This is the worst time to cry about James. Lily had walked several blocks before she realized that she was walking in the wrong direction.  
  
Without any expression on her face, she slowly turned around to walk to the restaurant where the party was. Still, she walked slowly, not caring if she was late. Thoughts of James swirled in her head. She arrived at the restaurant with a faraway look in her eyes. She didn't even realize that she was an hour late to the party.  
  
"Lily, where did you go?" cried Martha as she spotted Lily at the door. "Oh my god, why are you sweating like this?" Lily looked up to see the questioning look on everyone's faces: her mother, her sister, Martha, Charlene, Emily, Sirius, Remus, Peter, and especially Justin and his parents faces. Lily couldn't take it anymore as she felt this overwhelming force drop down on top her, and she fainted dead away. Shocked voices were heard everywhere inside the restaurant.  
  
A pair of strong arms caught her before she hit the floor. "She needs to lie down and some quiet, please," said the voice that belonged to those arms. "Thank you all for coming, but this is an emergency."  
  
Lily felt herself get carried into a room with a bed, and it felt good to lie down on a soft sheets. The door closed a few minutes later. Lily slowly opened her eyes. She didn't know how long she was lying in that bed, but then the door opened again.  
  
"Lily, are you awake now?" asked a voice. It was Lily's mother.  
  
"Mom, come in," said Lily, not really knowing how to face her mother now.  
  
"Lily, I don't mean to lecture you, but how can you come so late to your own engagement party?" scolded Lily's Mom.  
  
"Mom, I didn't mean to," said Lily quietly, looking at her hands. "I was just caught up in something."  
  
"I want you to go outside and apologize to Justin's parents," said Lily's Mom. "They are very upset at the turn of events."  
  
"It's okay, Mrs. Evans, I already told my parents to go home," said the handsome man at the door who carried Lily away a few moments earlier. "Besides, Lily clearly needs some rest."  
  
"Justin," said Lily. "Thank you, and I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't be. It's just a dumb engagement party anyways, we can always have another one," Justin reassured Lily. "Don't worry about my parents."  
  
Lily put her hand on Justin's and gave it a quick squeeze to show him how much she appreciated this.  
  
"Can I just have a few moments alone please?" asked Lily to her mother and Justin. "I need to think about some things."  
  
"Lily." said her mother.  
  
"Okay, I need to take care of some of the guests," said Justin, who then kissed Lily's forehead. "I'll come and take you home after I'm all done."  
  
The room was quiet once more. Lily thought back a few years ago. She had met Justin not long after she graduated from Hogwarts. They were both working in the Charms department at the Ministry. They had both came from muggle families, and they quickly became friends. The friendship lasted for a few years. He was so dependable and secure. He was so caring and kind. At first, Lily still was grieving over James' death, and Justin was the always- dependable friend who cheered her up and who let her cry on his shoulders. Somehow, their friendship turned into a relationship. Lily chuckled to herself as she thought about this. They didn't really know when the dating had begun. Everyone around them assumed they were dating, and they never corrected them, so they started dating. Theirs was such a quiet relationship. It was really more like a friendship than a relationship. Lily thought that she was so reluctantly to let Justin hold her hands because to Lily, those hands had already belonged to James.  
  
"Forget about him," Lily suddenly yelled out loud. "He's dead. He's dead. He's dead." 


	8. Questions

Lily had tears in her eyes when she ran out of Michael Shore's office. She seemed to cry awfully a lot lately. Lily wondered aimlessly around the London streets for hours. Her head was full of questions, full of possibilities. Could Michael be James? Is there such a thing as being alive after you die? With a different name?  
  
No, no, James is dead. Lily kept on telling herself. And you have Justin now. Justin. Lily thought about her and Justin's future, and then she made a decision. She quickly walked back to the office and asked to see her boss, Katherine.  
  
"Lily, how did the meeting with Mr. Shore go?" asked Katherine as she looked up from all the documents on her desk.  
  
"Actually, that's what I came to talk to you about," said Lily as she sat down on one of chairs in front of the office. "I don't think I should work on this project. I just don't feel comfortable working with Michael Shore."  
  
"Lily, is there a problem? Did something go wrong at the meeting?" asked a clearly worried Katherine. Lily wasn't the type of person to just refuse working with people.  
  
"No, it's me," Lily insisted. "I have never asked an request of you, Kate. Just this once."  
  
"All right," said Katherine reluctantly. "You are the best person for the case, but I'll figure something out."  
  
"Thank you," said Lily as she walked the door. "Really, thank you."  
  
Just as Lily left, an owl came through Katherine's window and left a note on her desk.  
  
"I want to sign the contracts and begin work right away. Can you come by tomorrow? - Michael Shore."  
  
Katherine quickly scribbled a yes on the paper and sent it back with the owl.  
  
*** Next Afternoon  
  
Michael was sitting in his office with his associate Kevin Hirsch having a cup of coffee.  
  
"What would you think when a girl looked at your face, and then cried?" asked Michael suddenly.  
  
"Maybe she was so thankful you should up in her life?" Kevin replied jokingly. "I would assume it happens a lot with you, Michael. The ladies seem all crazy about you."  
  
Michael laughed before he said, "No, seriously, the other day, this woman was here and she had tears in my eyes when she looked at me. I mean she looked at me. I felt like she could look into my soul."  
  
"Wow." said Kevin before he was cut off from the voice at the door.  
  
"Mr. Shore, Mr. Hirsch, the person from the ministry is here," said the young wizard. "Should I send her in?"  
  
"Please do," replied Michael, and to Kevin he said, "here she comes."  
  
"The girl you are talking about is that cute one from the ministry?" asked Kevin. Before Michael can answer, Katherine walked in the door.  
  
"Mr. Shore, it is good to finally meet you," said Katherine.  
  
"Same here," said Michael as he got up from his seat to go shake her hand, clearly surprised not to see Lily. "I thought you would sent Miss Evans."  
  
"Oh, I do all the contract stuff, she knows the details," Katherine quickly replied.  
  
"But she will be handling this project?" asked Michael.  
  
"Well, no, she's busy with something else right now, but I'm sure I can find you an equally good replacement."  
  
"I'm afraid that can't be, Miss. Coulter," replied Michael. "You see, we want to sign the contract because we are very pleased with Miss. Evan's work so far. So if she won't be the one to work with us, I'm afraid we can't sign the contract."  
  
"Are you saying you will only sign the contract if Lily works with you?" asked Katherine, not knowing what to think.  
  
"Correct."  
  
"I'm coming," Lily yelled out as she came out of the kitchen of London flat to open the door. She was surprised to find Katherine there. "Kate, what are you doing here? Oh, no, I didn't miss an appointment, did I?"  
  
"No, no, I just need to talk to you," said Katherine.  
  
"Come in, come in," said Lily. "I was just making some hot chocolate."  
  
Minutes later, they both sat down in the cozy kitchen to slip their hot chocolate.  
  
"Lily, I don't know how to ask you this," Katherine was the first to break the silence.  
  
Lily looked up, surprised. "You can ask me anything, Kate. You are like an older sister to me."  
  
"You have to work on the school project with Mr. Shore, Lily," said Katherine looking uncomfortable. "They requested you, and they wouldn't do it otherwise."  
  
"Me, why me? I've only been there a couple of times," said a surprised Lily.  
  
"They were really pleased with your work," Katherine simply said. "Lily, really, this school thing is very important to us at the ministry."  
  
"Okay, okay, if you put it that way," said Lily. "It's just for 6 months. I can handle it."  
  
"Lily, thank you," said a very happy Katherine. "I really appreciate this."  
  
"I'm home," Martha's voice rang out from the door. "Lily, I bought us dinner."  
  
"I should really get going," said Katherine as she picked up her bag and put on her jacket. "I'll see you at the presentation on Wednesday."  
  
"Katherine! I didn't know you were here," said Martha when she came in the kitchen. "I only bought dinner for two."  
  
"I'm leaving," smiled Katherine at Martha.  
  
"What was she doing here, Lily? And why that troubled face?" asked Martha as she took the food out of the packages.  
  
"It's something at work," said Lily as she took out plates and forks. "I can handle it, I think."  
  
The presentation on Wednesday went remarkably well for Lily. All her hard work was really paying off for her. She had only stayed a few minutes after the presentation to accept some congradulations and some small talk. She wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. She didn't want to spent another minute in there. She didn't want to spend another minute in the presence of Michael Shore. She just didn't want to.  
  
She took a deep breath as she came out the building. "Lily, what are you doing here?" asked a cold and oddly familiar voice.  
  
Lily turned around, and looked to see who called out her name. "Rebecca?" asked a shocked Lily. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"I'm here to see my boyfriend," said Rebecca in that cold and confident look. "You still haven't told me why you are here?"  
  
"Well, I'm working on a project here," replied Lily, still can't believe it's Rebecca, whom she haven't seen since Grauation 10 years ago. She haven't changed at all: the long blond hair, the icy stare, the cold voice, and that air about her.  
  
"Don't tell me you work with Michael," said Rebecca.  
  
"Michael Shore?" asked Lily. "He's handling the project."  
  
"Were you surprised when you saw him?" asked Rebecca, with a hint of emotion in her eyes. "He does really look like James."  
  
"He does," said Lily wanting to drop the subject. Rebecca was dating Michael Shore.  
  
"But you should know that he only looks like James. They are nothing alike," said Rebecca with a warning tone in her voice, and she quickly walked to the building.  
  
"Rebecca," cried out Lily just when Rebecca started to open the door. "Where did you meet him?"  
  
"I met him when we both worked in France last year," said Rebecca with her back to Lily. "He was there from America."  
  
"So, he grew up in America, then?" asked Lily, more to herself than to Rebecca.  
  
"He was born and raised in America," said Rebecca. "And this is the first time he's every been in London." Then she disappeared inside the door.  
  
Lily had wanted ask more questions. She had a million questions in her head, but she just slowly walked away. She has to walk away. Justin was waiting for her. He was waiting for her in the restaurant where they planned to have dinner. 


	9. memories, memories, memories

"Justin?" Lily was surprised to see Justin waiting outside her office building, "Did we have a date and I am now terribly late for it? I seem to do that a lot lately." 

"No, no, we don't have a date," Justin reassured Lily with a smile, and then he took hold of her hands. "I got off work early, so I thought we might go somewhere for dinner."

Lily smiled back at him. "That's very thoughtful of you, but remember tonight is girl's night out with Martha and the girls."

"That's tonight!" said a regretful Justin. "We hardly see each other anymore with your new project at work."

"I know, I know," Lily was feeling bad already, now she feels worse. "I'm sorry."

"Lily, there's no need to apologize," said Justin as they walked towards Lily's flat together. "I know how much you love your work, and I wouldn't want to take you away from it."

"How about dinner on Friday then?" asked Lily, wanting to make it up to Justin. She had missed the last three dates with Justin because she had to work late.

"Yeah, about Friday night," said Justin as if suddenly remembering something, "my mom asked me to bring you home for dinner on Friday."

"That's nice of her," said Lily. She hadn't talked to Mrs. Cavendish after the engagement party and had meant to see her and formally apologize for being late and distracted.

"So, you'll come on Friday?" asked Justin sounding worried that Lily would have to work.

"Of course, I wouldn't miss it for the world," said Lily as they stopped in front of her flat. "I'll let you know where to meet me on Friday."

"I'll probably meet you at your office, knowing the way you work," Justin said as he gave her light kiss good-bye.

Lily stood there for a long time watching Justin's back slowly disappear into the night. Her heart felt warm when she was around Justin, warm and safe. He will make a wonderful husband. That's what everyone told her. He will make a wonderful father. Her mother kept on insisting. Lily smiled as she thought of all the good things everyone always said about Justin. She was lucky, lucky to have someone like him in her life. She was lucky, except for the haunting ache she felt in her heart late at night.

"I looked at some of the information you sent me about the site you had picked out," said Lily as she handed Michael the preliminary design and plan from her folder. "From the information, I thought the safety will probably not be a problem for us."

"This looks good," said Michael, as he looked the plan over. "I was afraid that the safety was going to be a problem."

Michael said nothing more as he read over the plan. Lily used these few seconds to get a really good look at him. When he's reading like this not saying a word, he really does look like James. Lily found herself having troubling averting her eyes, but she quickly looked away when he turned to the last page. She resumed the cold expression on her face.

"I hope everything is to your satisfaction, Mr. Shore," said Lily as she put all her papers back into her folder. "I'll have the final plans ready after Katherine and you look at the site together."

"Is Miss Evans always like this?" asked Michael suddenly as he looked up from the proposal. "Cold, distant, unapproachable? I don't ever recall seeing you smile."

"I don't know what you mean," said Lily looking down at her hands.

"Some would say your behavior borders on being rude," said Michael with a twinkle in his eyes.

Lily looked up, surprise showed on her face, but she simple said; "If Mr. Shore would prefer working with someone else."

"I don't want to work with anyone else," interrupted Michael before Lily could finish. "I like your work, Miss Evans, and I would like to make our working relationship a comfortable one. I would like to be friends seeing how closely we'll have to work together for the next few months."

Lily made no comment to Michael's statement, and they both continued to work in silence.

Michael looked down at his watch and said, "Miss Evans, I think we've done enough work today. Since it is time for dinner, can I interest you in dinner?"

"Sorry, if we are all done here, I would like to leave," said Lily as she picked her papers and put them in her folder. "I've made other plans."

Michael watched as Lily disappeared behind the doors without another word. She's such a puzzle to him. Women usually fall at his feet, but this one, this one was different. With a light chuckle, Michael went back to work.

"Lily, I need a big favor," announced Katherine the minute she walked into Lily's office on Friday.

Lily looked up from her drawings and smiled. Katherine was forever asking for favors and forever promising it was the last one.

"Lily, I forgot I had to go to my son's school for something," said Katherine all out of breath. "And I already made the appointment to go and see the site with Mr. Hirsch today."

"And I'm guessing, you want me to go with Mr. Hirsch to the site," asked Lily, knowing full well that is what Katherine want her to do.

"Would you? You are the only one I trust," pleaded Katherine.

"Yeah, yeah, but this is the last one," joked Lily.

"The last one, I promise," yelled out Katherine as she ran out of the office.

Lily ran to the place where Mr. Hirsch was waiting for her. She was late again.

"Miss Evans," someone called out to her. It must be Mr. Hirsch. Lily turned around and was shocked to see Michael Shore waving at her.

"Where is Mr. Hirsch?" questioned Lily when she got close to him.

"He had some other business he had to attend to," said Michael, then asked, "Where is Katherine?"

"Oh, she had some family emergency," said Lily, surprised at the turn of events.

"I guess it's you and me then. Come, the ministry provided cars" Michael exclaimed as he got inside the car. Lily was slow to follow, eyeing him suspiciously.

They drove largely in silence. Lily refused to look at Michael, so she stared out her window absentmindedly. Michael darted looks in Lily's direction once in a while. Once, his eyes fell to her engagement ring.

A while later, "It that your engagement ring?" asked Michael.

Lily turned her face to him, looking surprised and nodded.

"It's so unlike you though," commented Michael. Lily looked to him with questioning eyes. "It's too shiny, too showy, too pretentious, and I suspect Miss Evans is exactly the opposite."

Lily wanted to say something, but she stopped herself before the words got out of her mouth. It's better this way she told herself. I do not want to get there with him.

"And they say women in love sparkle like a diamond," Michael continued his one-man show when Lily didn't reply. "But how come Miss Evan's eyes are so dull? Why is there sadness in your eyes when you're in love?"

Lily eyes suddenly looked up and into Michael's eyes. There was surprise there, and a little bit of anger, and a little bit of hurt. Michael looked a little surprised too for a second before looking back at the road.

"Please don't not make presumptions when you don't really know me, Mr. Shore," Lily said with more annoyance than anything else.

"Miss Evans is unassuming, unaffected by society's pretensions, and is someone who would cry by herself at night rather than worry someone else. She doesn't fit in with the flashy piece of rock on your hands. It's either you have extremely bad taste in jewlery or your fiancee doesn't know you at all. And I suspect it's the latter."

Lily felt a mixture of emotions at his comments, but she simple sat with her face turned away from Michael. She had felt anger. How dare he! how dare he who knew her a mere few weeks see the dullness in her eyes when she had done such a good job at hiding it away from everyone in her life. She had felt surprise. How is it that Michael can see straight through her no matter how much she tires to hide herself. She had been surprised when Justin gave her the ring because it was so unlike her. She had later wanted to change it, but Justin mostly just ignored her. Then there was hurt, a lot of hurt. This reminds her too much of the conversations she had with James. Michael's every gesture, every look reminded her of James. As they drove on, more and more memories of James flooded through Lily's brain. Tears threatened to come out the corner of her eyes, but she refused to let the tears drop.

"We are here," exclaimed Michael excitedly and flashed Lily a big smile. Lily stepped out of the car and was surprised by how beautiful the grounds looked. Everywhere you looked was snow, on the ground, on the trees, on the faraway mountains. The view was amazing. It was as if you could see the end of the earth standing there. Surprised by the beauty before her and the freshness of the air, Lily couldn't help but smile. Out of nowhere, a heavy winter coat dropped on Lily's shoulders. She turned around to see Michael standing behind her. "It's colder here than London," Michael simply said before he started walking around.

While Michael talked with people, Lily started taking pictures of the grounds. Through her lenses, Lily saw Michael lean back into the wall of the building and look toward the mountains as if in deep thought. Then he ran his hands through his hair. Lily could hear her heart beat faster. How many times had she seen James do the same thing at Hogwarts? Before she knew what she was doing, she was talking pictures of Michael. What would he think of me if he ever finds out these pictures, thought Lily.

"Miss Evans, come on, we are going up the hill," called out Michael, snapping Lily out of her trance.

They entered a little cabin on top of the hill, and Michael suggested they rest for a while before heading back to London. Lily sat down in front of the fire while Michael sat opposite her and took papers out of his briefcase. He put on glasses and started reading the preliminary proposals. Michael looked up from his paper and found Lily staring at him.

"Miss Evans, are you amazed at how good-looking I am?" joked Michael, trying to break the awkward silence.

"You've never been to London before? Have you heard of Hogwarts? Remember Professor McGonagall? Headmaster Dumbledore?" asked Lily in one breath. "Remember the Whopping Willow?"

"Wow, slow down, Miss Evans," said Michael, startled at all the questions. "How did you ever hold all these words in?"

"If I tell you, would you believe me?" asked Lily, staring straight into Michael's eyes.

Michael nodded, but at the same time the cabin doors burst open.


End file.
